AwkwardMisfit

Slightly lost, but hopeful that I'll find my way. Overly dramatic, but that's just how I see the world sometimes. I'm an idealistic idiot, with my head in the clouds, lost in a dream world. I like people, but I'm hesitant with them. I don't want to get attached and then cut loose; it's happened to often and hurts too bad to just welcome it again with open arms. I've got a listening ear, and some solid advice. All my pieces don't fit together, but I'm still pretty wise for my years. My ask box is open to any and everyone.

I Don’t Fall in Love

I don’t fall in love

I don’t fall in love, like a plane hurling towards utter destruction at 135 miles per hour, I plummet hopelessly into it

Falling would be too easy, like the time when I tripped over my own two feet when trying to run during a childish game of it tag,

Scraped skin off the palms of my hand, and a temporarily bruised ego would be delightful in comparison to the atrocious wreck that I have gotten myself into

The chaos that will now surely ensue is so painful to witness, I beg thee to look away, but like all accidents bystanders can’t help but explore the wreck with wondering eyes and prying ears

So here it goes,

The cage where I kept my butterflies spills open and they have been startled into uproar so great that the fluttering of their wings inside my gut is so incessant that I feel nauseous,

My heart is so overwhelmed by a profuse amount emotions that I don’t know if I want to laugh or cry, but I know that I have to react because standing here pretending like I don’t feel will drive me to even worse fates,

Exploding like a volcano, unable to control what will come out of me, I may say things I mean to keep hidden in the deepest parts of myself

So I laugh manically and I cry hysterically,

Why I’m doing both I don’t know, but somehow it feels right, like all the excitement you ignite within me has found a way to escape

Like a fire that starts small, catching light of a misplaced piece of fabric and slowly consuming more and more,

My feelings for you grow, finding more and more parts of you to idealize and craft into scenarios where we fall in love

Over and over again it replays, thoughts of you, that my heart clings to like clenched fists,

The lazy way you stand,

Hunched over and carefree

With your wild mane of kinky hair falling over your face effortlessly,

The tiny gap between your two front teeth, and then way you grin at me suggestively

Your morning voice after a long night up talking to me

Like gasoline to a fire,

You ignite the sweet burn of passion in my heart

You fill my lungs like the smoke in the air,

And within me begin so many clichés,

Unfolding and taking hold inside me like the roots of trees

You’re overwhelming so much more than just my heart

You’re in my head like a catchy song that I never expected to like

Surely I could just tell you how you make me feel

But I doubt you’ll understand a word I’m saying

What should be so simple will be my greatest challenge,

And if only my biggest worry was being a little tongue tied,

But like tripping over shoes laces I will stammer over my words

And with too many thoughts trying to cram its way out all at once I’ll stutter over my words and blur the meanings

Between the fragmented sentences, and the side conversations I’ll have with myself

You’ll be confused and probably run away

And in my moment of spontaneity I might chase you,

And if I chase you I’ll probably fall and end up with skin scrapped off the palms of my hand, a bruised ego, and worst of all, a broken heart 

"See this girl? Maybe this girl, she put wind in your sails. Maybe she’s your first great one."

- A Bronx Tale

(Source: real-hiphophead, via psychoprecipitation)

londonzhiloh:

London Zhiloh collab with underground_nyc

(via itscasssy)

ghosturs:

*stays alive just in case things get better*

(via breweryblues)

lameboob:

lameboob:

lameboob:

how do you make someone holy

you beat the hell out of them

my 96 year old catholic grandma told me this joke

(via mockparadise)

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